Choose or Lose

"Before I begin, let me state that this in not a poem. This is a collection of thoughts put together by a man who is guilty of active passivism. By this I mean that he, I, has been incapable of, or unwilling to do what needed/needs to be done. He has thoroughly mulled over the tasks at hand and has decided upon the route he must take, however, he fails to execute, time and time again. He allows things to happen instead of making things happen. He takes a seat when he should stand and forces himself to feign indifference.”

I wrote those lines during a very tumultuous time in my life. Don't get the wrong idea, I wasn't going through any family issues, my grades weren't slipping, I wasn't about to practice my Icarus impression on the Chapel tower (step you're Greek mythology game up). I just found myself (by some fault of my own) in a very difficult position, which, if handled incorrectly, would prove to be extremely volatile. Although I won't go into any details about the situation, I will say that it was a result of and perpetuated by my own inability to choose.

I have always considered myself to be a strong person (in mind, heart and body), but never before have I felt so utterly powerless over a situation. I convinced myself that there was absolutely nothing that I could possibly do to tactfully remedy the situation, when the truth of the matter was that I could fix it. I realized that I was trying my best to allow time to work its magic and alleviate all my problems, but the thing is, although time heals wounds, it also gives them ample opportunity to fester (pardon the image). I was forced to cast aside my fear of the repercussions and consequences, turn off the autopilot and direct my own course.

Thank God I did.

Jay-Z once said, "I drove past the fork in the road, and went straight." Hov may be able to walk through walls (no blasphemy), but I had to go right, because I didn't want to get left.
*acknowledges cornyness of last 13 words*
*Does Dave Chappelle's rendition of the Harlem Shake*
*Pats self on back*
*Publishes Post*

lol.

As always,

Pax, Amor et Musica

Apocalypse... Tomorrow!

That's right, everybody. March 31st. The biggest day of my life thus far; the day that will ultimately set the tone for my future - what I go on to become, how successful my career is, how well (or poorly) I will be remembered, so on and so forth blah blah blah.  March 31st, the day I've been waiting for ... well... forever. 

HA

Come on. Forever? Word? March 31st is huge, but "set the tone for my future"? My Four years in the boonies of New Hampshire at (not one of) THE best boarding school in the world will essentially culminate tomorrow, at 5:30 pm E.S.T. when I will have checked all of the emails and log in sites. I have been working, running, aspiring towards that awe-provoking "Congratulations!", and it'd be wrong for me to claim that anything but "Congratulations!" is acceptable. 

HOWEVER, my life is more than a sheet of paper inviting me to spend four years at the places I've dreamed about for, well years now. My accomplishments have been well documented and my legacy here at SPS is secure. I've had tremendous ups that far outweigh the downs, and thankfully my high school career has (thus far) enjoyed  less volatility than quite a few others (I know that sounds ridiculously unbelievable but it's true). And to sit here, overwrought with anxiety, inundated by work and rejected from Georgetown, and render my life thus far a failed venture because at this time tomorrow I may or may not have been accepted to a few of the best schools in the world is - absolutely, positively, without a doubt - ridiculous. 

They say "money ain't everything". Neither are College Decisions.

***

... wait, who am I kidding...? (haha)

JbP

It's Charles Hamilton.. (Get Acquanited)

Charles Hamilton


Welcome to another edition of Get Acquainted. Today, I'm introducing you all to a up and coming rapper who has been all over the net since last fall. His name is Charles Hamilton, and as you can tell from his picture, he's not your usual rapper. He's from Harlem, in Love with the color pink & Sega Genisis, has an entire philosophy on life and religion based on Sonic The Hedgehog (yes, the little blue thing from the videogames. (no, im not joking)), and was recently signed to Interscope Records. So as weird as he may sound, he got the co-sign from Dr. Dre himself, so he must be doing something right.

His style is really different from most other artists out. He makes it his goal to get the listeners to understand that he is his own person, and will not conform and curb his creativity for the sake of popularity or approval. Respectable, right? Over the past few months, he dropped a whole series of mixtapes called the Hamiltonization process (they can be found at iamnotcharleshamilton.com. Every mixtape has a certain theme or motif. I'll leave it up to you to figure those out. He's a very talented artist (he produces and raps), but most of the mixtapes are hit or miss. Therefor, I decided to post my personal favorites so you guys can make your own opinon about him. (click the links to download each mixtape. email me for individual tracks)(click his name at the top of the post to see his blog)

#1 Death of the Mixtape Rapper

Download Here

#2 It's Charles Hamilton

Download Here

#3 The L Word

Download Here

Enjoy, and as always,

Pax, Amor et Musica

Maneater

Go ahead, I'll give you time to laugh at the title.....................

Done? I'm sure you're not, but that's fine - I'll continue. The title, although slightly misleading accurately speaks to the ferocity of - drum roll please, everybody out of your seats - THE COLLEGE PROCESS. 

Quite simply put, the College Process is a Maneater. Schools like St. Paul's and Ex****, and And*****, and all those other that take after us (yea, I said it. None of the others are important...) are seemingly renowned for the manner in which they prepare students and young adults to move on to the "next level". Nah uh. What people really mean when they say this is, "Oh you want your son or daughter to "run with the Big Dogs"? Well, your child is less likely to get torn to pieces by the "Big Dogs" if he or she proves his or herself able to maneuver an intense college atmosphere with prominent success... before college." Now, that may sound brutal, but its accurate. In fact, that's just the watered down version.

Why "Maneater"? ( Now of course when I say "men" I mean Mankind. I guess I could have said People-eater, but that's not as funny.)Well, let me see if I can articulate this properly:

18 and 19 year old young adults are made to resemble 8 and 9 year old girls and boys, 

sophisticated human beings able to reason and think appear as diminutive happy meal toys, 

presented with decisions and choices (or lack thereof) many expect them to make,

the College Process comes along seeking to claim; so confidence it takes, 

and one thinks to himself, "Oh what should I do, what's next from here", 

and see that's after an Admission's Office sends that small envelope meaning "I'm sorry Dear",

Near grown men cry, mature women weep

all because they believe that their futures through that proverbial sieve seep.

And it's sad, because successful students who were captains and role models and community Leaders

are forced to bow to what I call the Maneater.

It's a shame to think - to know that I've grown close to and developed relationships with people who will experience confusion, self-doubt, regret, and grief all wrought on by the Maneater. Some of the strongest people I know have broken down or will soon do so, and who can blame them - After four years of grueling "pre-college", who wants to read the words: I'm sorry ____ but we regret to inform you...

And all of that has led me to this: You, the institution, tell us that if we "do what we're supposed to" defeating the Maneater won't be a problem; you reassure us that everybody well be fine provided you follow the rules and guidelines you set forth. That's bullshit. I know people who've exceeded your expectations, who've gone far beyond the call of duty, yet, sit idle in a heap of gnawed bones. 

If the College Process is a Maneater, You, elite boarding school, are a Manmisleader. 

Sed tam est vita

JbP

Get Acquainted

As the Music addict that I am (for proof, see picture above from my iTunes), I will, from time to time, post links to new, hot and exclusive music for your listening pleasure.

Without further ado Let's Get you Acquainted:

Fedd Hill


DOWNLOAD THIS MIXTAPE HERE

Here is a link to the myspace of this group called Fedd Hill out of Prov. City, Rhode Island. "Fedd Hill offers a new breed of hip-hop music that serves as the voice of New England. The group bases their music on real-life events and many of their tracks tell stories of courage, heartbreak and the hunger for a better world." Although taken from their bio, I would second those statements. Their music is motivated by thier struggles and successes, and is more than worth a spot in anyone's collection. Just click the link (it's in blue right there) and check them out. They've really supported the The JumpOff (our radio show) over the past 4 years, and they definitely have some good stuff for you to hear. Tell them Lubeen sent you.

Drake

I don't know what to say. If you all don't ATLEAST have his latest mixtape, So Far Gone, you must've been sleeping for the past few months. Drake is a new rapper coming out of Canada(Toronto Stand UP!) who's bringing a fresh, new sound to the game. As a matter of fact, you guys may remember him from the teen-soap opera Degrassi. Don't believe me? Check the pictures:

Jimmy on Degrassi

Drake aka Drizzy

Click the link, Go to his blog, look on the right and download the mixtape. Do yourselves a favor.

That ends it for today, but I'm gonna try to get new stuff for you guys as close to daily as I can. And if you ever want anything, Email me. I'm open for requests.

UPDATE

Here's a link to his newest mixtape, So Far Gone

Download Here

as always

Pax, Amor et Musica

I'm A "Jerk"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQC1w7lIrIA

For those of you who think watching people perform new urban dances on YouTube is waq ( Little Known Fact: the "q" placed after the "wa" actually emphasizes wackness), allow me to briefly describe what appears at the end of the above link. Six Black kids from L.A. are attempting to bring back dead dance moves from the late 80's and early 90's. They incorporate different new urban dances and styles of clothing with old dance moves and bright colors; the end result is a "bridged gap" of sorts. They call this, "Jerkin'", and anybody who Jerks is a - you guessed it - "Jerk".

Old School meet New School. New School, Old School.

Now before I proceed to why this ignorant, obnoxious, ridiculous dance is so significant to me, let me first say that this urban culture (oh yeah, culture) is hot. It's unique; it's difficult; it's refreshing... But enough of the glorification of regressive behavior.

This... style... does more than evoke laughter, applause, and admiration. It effectively joins two generations, two periods of time. The running man is one of the most recognizable dance moves of all time, and was made famous during the 80's; the "Reject" is a staple of "Jerkin'" and is just the running man, but backwards. To some, all you will see after you copy/paste the link into your URL box and hit "Enter" is a few kids, 16 and 17 years old, being loud and obnoxious in the streets when they could have just as easily picked up a book, turned on CNN, or attempted their math homework. But to me, those same 16 and 17 year old loud and obnoxious kids playing in the streets are doing something that is in many ways more important than the aforementioned "productive" activities; they are preserving the rich and bountiful past from which the present has been derived; they are creating their own image and offering to society something more powerful than political misguidance and economic greed: individuality. The fact that they dare to deviate from the norm and improve upon a tradition in urban culture that once defined neighborhoods and other communities is refreshing, not to mention inspiring. Who would have thought you could learn anything from a few 17 year olds talking trash and dancing in the middle of the street?

Dare to be Different.

JbP

Allow Me To Re-Introduce Myself...

Yoooo What up!?

lol. I'm not gonna do that to my introductory post. (maybe the second one)

I would say that I don't need to (re)introduce myself, but I will for any new faces out there. Here's my blogger resume, of sorts.

Name: Lubeen
Nickname(s): Big Lube, Lube, Mr. Damage Control etc.
Hometown: St. Albans, NY (Q-U-E, another E-N-S! (c) consequence)
Interests: Success. Music. Success through music. Twitter. Brooklyn. (Let's see how long it takes for the comments/jokes to come in from my fellow 5ive.)
Hobbies: Music (listening, writing, making, thinking about, talking about), Working out (Big Lube is not a misnomer), watching movies (I can NOT turn down a bad action movie. Who wants to see Transporter 3 with me?), Blogging, Tweeting (Twitter.com/Lubeen (shameless plug)), spending time with those that matter to me.
Accomplishments: This is a superfluous section. You've read the blog. You see the people I surround myself with. Use your imagination.

This should give a pretty good idea of who I am. Anything else will be revealed in time like Sun creeping over the horizon. (Oh yeah, btw, my metaphor and simile game is quite on point.)

Till the next post,

Pax, Amor et Musica

The Journey....

This journey began September 2004 when i left home for pastures anew in search of the greener educational grass on the other side. It has taken me from the heat and humidity of Lagos, Nigeria to the wine drinking and cheese/bread eating in France down to the fragile and enigmatic post-apartheid South Africa and now here in "God's Own Country" The USA. This journey has led me to these four incredible young men who have pushed me in every way to be the best I can be, and not look at the man next to me. 

As we continue our journey from boys to the young men we are today to full grown men we shall soon become, I will continue to give you an insight into my life and into my different perspective.

The keys to success in my opinion apart from hard work are Respect, Honesty, Responsibility, Accountability and most importantly, Integrity...

That is the standard the five of us have held each other to. Do the same and be successful...

-Mr Ajayi

Discourse of the Times

Dear Applicant,

We regret to inform you that you did not make the cut. It is not to say that you were not good enough, although we know you must be feeling that way. It's really a matter of circumstance. You see, black applicant, you are not the norm. You may think that by attending high school and perhaps being a force in your community, you can create a positivity, but you try in vain. Because, whether you like it or not, for every one of you that makes it, you are always the odd man out. CNN will always report the statistic of 1 out of every 10 black men in the United States is incarcerated, but will never talk about the Cornell Wests, Michael Eric Dysons, or even your parents, (did they do the college thing?) It just does not make for entertaining news. We do not want to hear about successful black owned companies. Violence creates interest, poverty tugs at our heart strings but seldom reaches our back pockets, and your history; well,..its has nothing to do with us, so please refrain from bringing it up. You can always go to an HBCU. Oh, I see here that your parents make over $70,000 with combined incomes, so you probably will not get any aid, from them at least. Do they have good credit? Yes, we understand your father borrowed against his retirement to pay for your Common App but why do you deserve a shot? My hands are tied here. You're from New Hampshire, try UNH. Listen it really isn't you, its us. Well, truthfully its a combination. So, Mr. Jackson, while we would like to offer your admission, and you have an impressive profile, we just do not have anything to give you. Please refrain from any sort of bitterness that may arise throughout this process. We know it may be hard for you, but imagine how we feel.

Sincerely,

Ambigious U

P.S. UPS is hiring